Bike lovers, I need your help.

I'm constantly hearing how dangerous everything is 1. because cars are safe and only dummies would risk their lives riding bicycles on the street (At night! In the weather! Alone on the mean streets of Minneapolis!) 2. because being a woman (At night! In the weather! Alone on the mean streets of Minneapolis!) makes you vulnerable.

Of course there are elements of truth to all of these comments. The world is not a perfectly safe place. Crime and violence happen. Crashes happen. People get hurt. But isn't life a cycle of acknowledging risk, assessing, minimizing, and adjusting your actions to find the safest way to do what you want? Nothing is without risk.

...Isn't it funny how strangers feel like they can walk up to you and say, "I would never ride in the dark like that. Aren't you afraid you're going to get hit by a car?" "I can't believe you walk around the city at night by yourself. Aren't you worried you're going to get attacked?"
...Whereas I would never go up to someone and say, "Putting in overtime? Have fun pumping all that OT into your gas tank!" or "It's icy out there. I hope you don't get in a car crash tonight." "Oh, I see you are complaining about how much your car maintenance costs again. Well, I gotta go enjoy the sunshine, wind in my hair, and singing birds now. Later!"

I just hate how genuine concern comes wrapped in judgment and condescension and with no constructive solution other than the implied, "Don't go anywhere alone ever," and "To be safe you need a car." I reject both of those ideas as oppressive, unrealistic, and completely wrong for my lifestyle. (Not to mention these comments are just setting them up to say "I told you so"/ blame the victim if something ever did happen...)

What am I supposed to say to these well-meaning people? I need some pro-bike, pro-independent-WTF rhetoric!

I have tried these phrases, with no success, in response to the people in my life that like to concern themselves with my safety/ judge my transportation choices:

How do I respectfully tell people that my choices aren't crazy and dangerous and that they should maybe mind their own business? Surely I am not the only one that deals with this on a daily basis.

This is what I say, "If you're truly concerned for my welfare, make and stick to a pledge to always check for cyclists while driving. Thanks! I appreciate it."

" when I was growing up my mother told me to always be afraid of the big bad wolf... what she didn't realize, was that she was raising the woodswoman"-Luci

Also, you must just exude a friendlier aura than me. This happens to me rarely. But, when it does, I just ask that the stranger "kindly fuck off."

I think it better serves my point to be direct.

While certainly not respectful, I think a modified version of a quote from the movie Jarhead would be a humorous response... Or at least you wouldn't get any more "helpful" advice...

"Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for I am the baddest mother fucker in the God damn valley?"

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0418763/quotes

The first thing that comes to mind is to mug them. The cycle of concern trolling will end at that moment.

The second (and more legal) response would be something along the lines of what I tell everyone that freaks out on my riding:

"I'm not afraid of the same things you are"

For some reason that shuts most of them up; perhaps there's a flicker of recognition of their absurd, lifelong cowardice.

If you want to educate, try citing this link:



- Source

That's pro-bike.

I'm not sure why being a woman would make bicycle riding more dangerous. I'm pretty sure my penis doesn't have the power to repel traffic crashes. And while men can get quite hairy in the winter, it is just an urban myth that beards provide any significant cushioning in a crash.

You haven't seen my beard, have you?

For what it's worth, Boobs don't either.

As a dude, I don't feel safe walking alone in my neighborhood at night. On a bike, out in the road, I don't think twice about it:
-No one will sneak up behind me
-Anyone that gets in front of me is going to get run the fuck over at a high rate of speed
-Someone says anything to me, I'm out of earshot in seconds

I like the "I'm not afraid of the same things you are."

Also, remember you have experience with this. You've biked at night, alone, as a woman, etc. before. You know exactly how dangerous it is and it's not stopping you.

+1 I will remember this one.

Tell them you carry.

Show concern for them driving a car since 100 people per day die in car crashes.

NineAces told me she stays off the LRT at night, and for good reason: its dark and shit has gone down there. Other than that, I can't imagine gender playing any real role in increasing danger while cycling.
If there's one thing I've learned about bicycle advocacy, it's that you can't convince people. Period. I know this from being vegetarian as well. People will often "listen" to you, but very few people will change their lives. (for the record, I'm happy to talk about being vegetarian but I didn't like being judged for eating meat when I did, so I make a pretty big effort not to judge people who do when I talk about it)
People perceive biking as dangerous, and they're right, it's us wearing a helmet against a 2000 pound cage with a maniac and/or total dipshit behind the wheel. But oh well. We know the risks, and they're not much really, and we all know that.
I was having a conversation with a friend who doesn't really ride at all about riding in the winter and how she "would never do it." I thought the same thing a few years ago. "Dude, thats effing nuts..." and I find that all the reasons people tell me this are basically null and void.
1) The streets are usually clear within a day.
2) Studded front tire
3) YOU KEEP YOUR SELF WARM right out the door. No car to brush off and warm up and sit freezing in untill the engine warms up enough to heat the cabin.

Point is, I could explain these things till we're both blue in the face and people are still gonna be like "yeah...well, I still never would" and I imagine a discussion about gender would end the same way. So shrug it off and go ride while they enjoy their cage of misery

JenNastix, the comments don't normally come from random people. I guess I posted this rant because after hearing stuff like, "You're a woman so you should be scared of everything," and, "You ride a bike so you're going to get your skull crushed by an SUV," on a fairly regular basis starts to get to you. Sometimes I feel like I'm the only crazy person out there that enjoys the simple pleasures of a bike ride. It's nice to know there are other crazies out there. =]

Thanks for making me feel so much better, bike lovers!

JenNastix, I like your high road comment. I'm going to use it.
Poorimpulsecontrol, I want to be a woodsman too! Awesome.
yynot, that's my attitude on Trail Watch, at least. Seriously- if you want to keep your daughters safe, teach them some self confidence. Don't teach them to be afraid of the big bad wolf, give them an ax. (Metaphor. I don't support axing animals. Or violence. Or weapons.)Great call! Thank you for this.

Dasunt- Exactly. One person in particular is always telling me that I should be "extra careful" because I am a woman. They would never let their daughter do the things I do. Thanks for the pro-bike quote/ source! I'm adding it to my arsenal.That's really nice to be reminded of, I really appreciate that.

Nickel, I hear what you're saying, but talking about how dangerous and bad and expensive and dirty cars are does not phase someone that has convinced themselves that a car lifestyle is the only way to live. Not to mention I'm already arrogant and self-righteous enough without talking about carbon emissions and peak oil... =p My whole gripe is that I feel like I'm not allowed to live my life without judgment, and I don't really want to judge people that want to commute in their cars. It's not for me, but I understand the appeal. All I'm asking is for a little understanding in the other direction.What does that have to do with gender? Dudes should probably be alert or avoid the LRT if it makes them uncomfortable. Dark trails give lots of people the creeps, it doesn't mean that "women, especially" should be wary.